Part 2 - Start the conversation today…
Start the conversation with your children about items' emotional, sentimental, financial, and future value. If you believe something is valuable, bring in a professional appraiser and document it. In many cases, we find that the value is much less than expected, but sometimes, items from the estate have fetched a good price at auction. Kelsey at SBSOS has sold hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of incredible items for our clients over the years.
Which items do you think are most valuable to your family? These items may differ from one generation to the next. Large, heavy furniture, though beautiful, may require more work for younger families to accept or fit into their modern and often smaller homes. We understand these challenges and can act as peacemakers between parents and children, helping to navigate these sensitive conversations.
Our experienced team at SBSOS can help you identify what's essential and what should be kept for your new, smaller living space. We understand that planning can be overwhelming, and we can assist you in sorting and organizing your belongings, ensuring everything is cataloged, accounted for, and digitally shared with your children.
It's essential to create a plan early on. Don't assume your kids will know what to do or want to deal with these matters during stressful times such as dealing with ailing parents or sudden deaths. We encourage our clients to have these discussions early with their children. This process becomes overwhelming for families when we are called in to help at the last minute due to a health crisis or sudden loss.
Creating a plan now will make you feel more organized and supported. If your children cannot be physically present, our team can use technology to involve them. We can create a private website for the entire family to go through the house and mark items they would like earmarked. We can then pack and ship these items to family members who live out of state or temporarily store them for the next visit to Santa Barbara.
It's vital to discuss emotional attachments with your family. Engage them in discussions about which items they feel strongly about and why.
Your children will appreciate you for having these conversations while you are healthy and alive. We have witnessed many family disputes that could have been avoided if these conversations had occurred earlier. Grown children often become overwhelmed with the responsibility to clear out a parent's home under stressful circumstances. Let's avoid having entire homes boxed up and stored because decisions were delayed. Storage units are costly and not helpful as they become permanent money warehouses. Let’s be brave today and address these conversations while everyone is in the room together.
Share your decisions with your children and seek their input. Engage them in the process and let them know they can be involved.
If your children tell you that certain items won't work for their homes, our team at SBSOS can help you let go of these items gracefully, respectfully, and with love, whether through an estate sale or by donating to a family in need.
If your children can come over for a weekend, involve them. Make an appointment to go through the house together during the next family gathering. SBSOS can give you a basic tool kit for making a first pass with your children at Thanksgiving.
Call us, and we will swing by with a tool kit and direction sheet to get started now.
Check out part 3 of this topic for more detailed information.
Warm regards,
Deborah & Kelsey
